I used to wish that I had a reason to give it all up and go pursue the thing that I love doing. Its an odd thing, how people will dismiss someone who just decides to pursue their passion. If they aren’t rich or dying, it becomes taboo to actively pursue your dreams since “you have your whole life to pay for”.
I don’t know, I guess I’m trying to steer into the skid. I mean, I’ve eaten a lot of red meat and forgotten sunscreen. The likelihood of some chronic condition or failure is increasing every time I use my cell phone. I don’t feel like I need to get cancer or lose more of my hair to start living a life I want to live. We’re all dying, technically.
I’ve spent my entire life studying and attempting the semi-responsible lifestyle. And I’m not throwing that all away just yet. I’m just saying that maybe we need to go fuck up and experience true failure. I haven’t felt that in a while, and god knows that I need some of it to start growing. Maybe I need to go be young before I can be old.